Last Friday the Supreme Court made its ruling on the case
related to gay marriage. The internet
has been abuzz with responses and emotions run high on both sides of the
issue. I have read a number of articles
in an attempt to understand the decision and its implications, particularly in
regard to my role as the pastor of the Jicarilla Apache Reformed Church.
Two weeks ago it was my privilege to attend the annual
meeting of my denomination, the Reformed Church in America, where issues around
homosexuality have been primary points of discussion for many years. This year was no exception. While gay marriage may now be a decided
matter as a civil concern, within the church issues related to homosexuality
are not so clearly settled. At least not
within my denomination. Many other denominations
have reached settled positions, on each side of the issue.
So at our meetings this year we talked openly about the
fact that we have an "elephant in the closet," freely identifying
what that elephant was and recognizing that, for better or for worse, as a
denomination we should make a decision about the elephant. We need a decision, one way or the
other. And we set forth on a process to
reach a decision.
I could go on about the process we are going to use and some
of the things that will come up in the discussions and decision-making
process. But not today. For the sake of
this post I would say that the two sides of this issue have fundamentally different
understandings of the idea of "Christian love." The issue of gay marriage has been framed in
society and the church as being all about love.
But what is love? More
specifically, what is Christian love?
Before going farther I want to quote what my wife, Robin,
posted to her blog on Sunday about Jesus and love. She said:
Jesus
told us to love one another.
John 13:34 says that we are to love one
another as Christ first loved us. Jesus didn't hate sinners! He loved us. And
then he told us to love each other. He didn't say, "Love your neighbor as
yourself, unless he's ___________." ANY word can go in that blank because
Jesus didn't exclude anyone. And neither should we.
Her post was
titled "Four
things this Christian wants to say about the Supreme Court ruling."
At our denominational meeting one thing that everyone seemed
to agree on was that no one should be excluded from the church. No one said anything like, "Those people
don’t belong in the church. If we let
them in then I am leaving." I never
heard anything like that. And the reality of our day is that it is very possible that gay men and women are in nearly every
congregation of our denomination.
The issue isn't a matter of if these people are present, but
how do we show Christian love towards them?
And to this question I see two possible answers.
The first is that we welcome them for who they are, meaning
that we accept them as homosexual because they were created that way. Humans are created in God's image, these
people are created in God's image and they are gay, therefore there is nothing
that we might say is right or wrong about their sexual identity.
The loving thing is to welcome them, to celebrate them and their
relationships, as much as we would celebrate any heterosexual relationship. Jesus loved everyone. God is love. We practice Christian love by welcoming and
celebrating gays as fellow sisters and brothers in Christ.
Again, that is one possible way of defining
and practicing Christian love. This is
my understanding of the application of Christian love by one side of this
discussion.
But there is another way, a perhaps more radical way, to
show Christian love. It, too, recognizes
that all women and men are created in the image of God, but also acknowledges
that all women and men come into the world under the curse of sin.
We don’t get to choose which particular sins we are most
susceptible too, or the sins we seem most enmeshed in. We don’t get to choose the sins that in our
internal conversations, and even our prayers to God, we continually try to
deny, explain away, or pretend don’t exist.
If you call yourself a Christian then that means, nearly universally,
as a minimum definition, that you are a sinner who has been saved from the eternal
consequences of your sin by the work accomplished by Jesus on the cross and at the empty
tomb. Saved from the consequences of
your sin, but still living as a sinner in a fallen world.
And this is where the second understanding of expressing Christian
love comes in. The reality of the eternal
consequences of sin, as described in the Bible, are horrible. The Bible never soft-peddles the wrath of
God that is directed towards sin.
Is it loving to allow what the Bible calls sin to just go on
within the lives of people in the church, to even celebrate those things, and
not to say a single word about repentance and the need for every sinner to seek
God's help in living a life that looks more and more like the life of their
Savior?
I don’t think so.
Salvation in Jesus is a sweet and beautiful thing. And receiving those eternal promises changes
the way I have to live in the world. As
His beloved child, one that He loved so much that He gave His very life for as
the payment for my sin, means that I need to change the ways I live. I need to change them each and every
day. I need to search out those things
in my life that are contrary to His will and sincerely seek to deal with
them. And sincerely dealing with them
means, at a minimum, that I have to acknowledge that these things, these sins,
are present, and seek God's help in changing my attitude and behavior towards
them.
My guide in doing all this is God's word. He defines what a sin is, and I have no say
in the decision-making process. I may be
deeply in love with something that He calls sin. My feelings about it don’t matter. The culture may exalt a particular thing His
word says is wrong. His will does not
yield to the culture.
If I truly belong to Jesus then living according to His guidelines
is part-and-parcel of my identity. A
changed life is not optional, and He drives the changes.
As a pastor I won’t, I can't, deny that dealing from a Christian
perspective with matters of sexual identity and behavior, in the culture of our
day, is a very complex matter. When the
culture virtually screams that so many different things of human sexuality, heterosexual
and well as homosexual, are morally neutral and to be celebrated, that is a
hard force to resist. But the loving
thing is not to join in the celebration. The loving thing is to speak God's truth to it. As a Christian the loving thing is to call sin
what it is, and to walk with that brother or sister to a closer place to their Savior. To our Savior.
In 1 Timothy 1:15 Paul writes,
"The
saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came
into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost."
Those words apply to me.
The foremost of sinners. They
apply to me as fully as they apply to Paul or to any other sister of brother in Christ.
Christian love does not celebrate sin. It cannot celebrate
sin. But it does help sinners see who
they really are and then leads them towards a life that is shaped more and more
like their Savior's.
To Him be glory, now and forever. Amen.
Scripture quotations
are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®), copyright © 2001 by
Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All
rights reserved.